STAGE 1. THE BREAK UP!
Are you dealing with a break up!?? Still obsessing over why things didn’t work out? When going through a break up, whether a long or short lived relationship, I have 3 rules that I live by:
Rule #1) I ALWAYS cut ties with my ex boyfriends. Period, point, blank! We weren’t friends before we dated, and we don’t need to be friends now. This may sound harsh to some people, but remember, this is what I do for my own peace. Seeing them up and down my social media time line just causes me confusion. “What did I do for them to leave? Why am I not good enough? Is he still watching my posts?” So I had to literally cut it off and in some cases block them from social media. Not to be mean, but for my OWN PEACE. We can spend so many hours obsessing over someone that honestly God didn’t even create for us! I would rather hurry up and heal so I can get to that man God has for me! He sounds much better anyway, right!? hahaha!
Rule #2) I make sure I don’t take too long to sulk. I give myself a couple weeks to process what is going on, and I deal with the issues head first!! Keep in mind, I haven’t had a long term relationship in YEARS, so a couple of weeks for me is easy to process the pain. I deal with the issues first and heal secondarily. This may sound weird, but I don’t have time to drag things out! I have found that it will only drag out my healing process, and like I said, my goal is to get to that blessing God has for me, not constantly figure out why he removed this guy! The key for a successful break up, is accepting this isn’t what God has for you, and just trying to get to the other side! I promise the pain goes away in time, you just have to think ahead and know that you’ll be over it eventually! Easier said then done, but knowing you’ll get to the other side in due time has always helped me! I apply this mindset to all of my issues in life!
Rule #3) Don’t put your FAITH into your FEELINGS. During this process I always have to remind myself to put my faith into my future!! This is what it means to walk by faith, and not by sight. If I put my faith into how I feel in the moment, I will never be able to heal. This is another method that I live by, in all areas of my life!
I know this post was short and sweet, but I promise the next two posts will go into more depth about the pain and healing process and really finding joy in your singleness!! Next up, I’ll be talking about jealousy, comparison, lack of faith, and dealing with the bad days!!
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